The Last Interlude: Anger Management.
“The Black Energy Wave, a political party or a sports drink.”
“YOU DECIDE!”
“Eheheh, you’re still doing that, aren’t you, Kyra. You got a serious onee-chan complex, don’t you?”
“Guilty as charged. Now come here so I can give you a noogie.”
“Shouldn’t they have made more? I mean… what was stopping them from making as many as needed? Because sometimes, a zerg rush is the best option, right?”
“Uh… maybe not.”
“……”
“What?! Why are you all staring at me like this?”
“We all want you to choose us, Chaz.”
“Uh…. yeah, thanks for the guilt-trip, guys.”
“So… who are you going to choose, Chaz?”
“Yes, Chaz! Who?!”
“Aw, man, I can’t deal with this. Um…. you guys just… wait… riiiiight here for a… while.”
“So… where are we going now?”
“I can hear the call of one last side quest.”
“Wait, seriously? We’re on the brink of evil madness, and NOW you want to go on a side trip?”
“Yep!”
“I… just… OK, fine. The death of the universe is now on YOUR hands.”
“Ah, we’ll still make it. Don’t you worry about a thing.”
“Ah, yes, this place. …that we got THROWN OUT OF the last time we were here.”
“Well, I’m going to enter this building, and this time, I’m going all the way to the top!”
“Hey, that’s my line.”
“This place sure likes the reverberating stuff.”
“Oh. Uh… OK? Is it because of my shining… uh, sword?”
“Was that a euphemism? Was it, Chaz? Because you know what that means, right?”
“Uh… no. Just forget what I said.”
“Chaz, we agreed on not doing this anymore, didn’t we?”
“Yes. Yes, we did.”
“And this is just a SOL-DEW.”
“Yes, Wren.”
“Now don’t make me bring this up again.”
“Um… Wren, stairs don’t work like that.”
“Yeah, you’re supposed to ascend from the lowest part.”
“That’s what YOU think. But I’ll show you. I’ll show you all.”
“Yes, thank you, blatantly named protective piece. Now we must find the ‘Flimsy Helmet’ to balance it out.”
“Bloodsaber?”
“You should wipe off the blood from time to time. Just a tip.”
“Ah, this must be the top floor. We made it, guys.”
“…..”
“Guys?”
“…..”
“What the… why am I standing up here alone now? Where did those jerks go?”
“You’re being uncharacteristically aggressive, Alys. Hey, Alys? Alys?! What’s up, Alys? Answer me, Alys. Come on, Alys. ALYS ALYS ALYS ALYS ALYS ALYS ALYS ALYS ALYS!”
“I’M TOTALLY FREAKING OUT AAAAAAAAH!”
“You’re not Alys at all, are you?”
“…jerk!”
“What? ‘Jerk’?! That’s it? That’s all I get? Man, I was totally messing with your head, and you call me a ‘jerk’? What a weenie.”
“OK, fine! ‘Asshole’, then.”
“It’s a step in the right direction, at least. Anyway….”
“I’m starting to think you’re too stupid for this special technique, but let me try to spell this out as simply as possible…”
“Yeah, that sounds like a brilliant idea. Let me just check what my ambassador of potentially bad ideas has to say about this.”
“IT’S A VERY FEMININE GUY DRESSED UP AS A GIRL WHO’S TRYING TO GET THE ATTENTION OF A GUY!”
“Ye-..wait, what?”
“In other words… IT’S A TRAP!”
“So there you have it.”
“Haha, you got me. But you can still get this skill, you know.”
“Maybe. But let’s not make this side trip of yours a waste of time now, hmm?”
“This is a sales pitch, isn’t it? It’s just a technique that lets me blow stuff up more effectively, isn’t it? Adding stuff like ‘forbidden’, ‘lost’ or ‘banned’ is just something you say to make us want to find it and use it even more.”
“Oh no, I think someone is on to me.”
“Wait, you bought that? You… your naivety is very… arbitrary.”
“Yeah, I know. Rune tells me that all the time.”
“Whohohooo, I can’t wait to try this out. I’m going to Megid the crap out of this place.”
“Uh… on second thought…”
“OKGOTTAGOBYE!”
“What have I done?!”
“MOUHAHAHA EAT IT, BITCHES! WHO’S YOUR DADDY NOW, HUH?! WHO IS YOUR LORD AND MASTER?!”
“Well, Chaz has lost himself. What do we do now?”
“Naw, I’m fine. Anyway, let’s just go back and get this over with.”
“Say, wanna see what a Megid looks like in space?”
“WHOA, WAIT A SECOND! DON’T DO IT!”
“Juuust kidding.”
“Take the controls, Rika. I have to go change my motor oil now.”
OK, so NOW the final confrontation is upon them all, and Chaz has to make that final choice. Realizing he has to put the fate of the solar system over the feelings of his friends, he does the only thing he CAN do.
“You know, I just realized the best way of choosing who gets to come with us: PUTTING IT UP FOR A PUBLIC VOTE!”
“Wait, what?”
“You… can’t be serious.”