Chapter 13: Picking up the past for the future ahead.
“Well, then. This is the cave where your subparts lie, Wren. Are you as excited about this as I am?”
*mutter* “Probably not.”
“Now, now, Wren. Everything can’t be all fun and games, you know.”
“If that’s the case, what’s up with the huge grin?”
“I’m entitled to it.”
“This floor is so wet. Are you sure you guys are rustproof?”
“You only ask now? But yeah, we’ve already crossed several stretches of sea in both directions, so I think it’s safe to assume we both are.”
“I think the rustic look would fit me, though. Sure beats dull metal grey, at least.”
“Since when did you turn into one of the Fab Five?”
“Hey! I’m NOT like those prancing fools.”
“Yeah, they usually tend to have better taste in things.”
“Look out. We’re all in the splatter zone.”
“Oh great. Another one of those, and it’s a brown one this time.”
“Alas, to think that my end would come at the hands of a big clump of dirt. How will I ever live THIS down?”
“Oh, shut up!”
“That sure is a lazy way of attacking.”
“I think I saw this in a rap video once.”
“But performed by beings far easier on the eyes, I bet.”
“Well… yeah.”
“And now I have the force.”
“Well, I’m not going to FORCE you to wear it or anything.”
“STOP THAT!”
“Eeeheheh, if I’m going to suffer, I’m going to take all you bastards with me.”
“That’s… that’s not fair.”
“The huntg is on.”
“What are you talkg about?”
“OK, fine! DON’T stop that.”
“Ohoho, you won’t get us with reverse psychology THAT easy.”
“Curses!”
“And in our next entry of ‘oddly named gear’….”
“Literally, even.”
“I guess it’s a good thing that we’ve never felt the need to ask for ‘gear’ at the nearest armor store. We’d only get hats for you.”
“Another huge piece of…”
*AHEM*
“…aaanyway, we have a new enemy.”
“It’s a Roboman.”
“Now with Kung-Fu grip.”
“Wh… he’s got a sword, but instead he attacks us by doing suggestive hand motions? That’s… that’s just swell.”
“Well, guys. I think this is it. The diving parts have to be in one of these chests.”
“I guess I can only hope that the other two chests disappear when you choose one.”
“Then we need to make sure to pick the right one first.”
“And that’s just what we did.”
*sigh* “OK, fine. I’ll get them installed right away.”
“That’s the spirit.”
“More Laser stuff. Aren’t those kind of outdated now?”
“Yes, they are replaced with Force and Ceramic stuff.”
“These naming conventions make no sense.”
“Well, we came for the subparts anyway, and thankfully, they NEVER go out of style.”
“You only say that because you haven’t seen them in action.”
“Finally outside again. All this spelunking is wearing me down.”
“Not to worry, though, because now we can get back to backtracking again. Won’t that be a whole lot of fun?”
“Oh, quiet you. And speaking of backtracking….”
“YOUR PALACE SUCKS!”
“Uh… Crys, you already told him that.”
“No, the last time I told him that he sucked at designing castles.”
“It’s the same th… oh, never mind.”
“Well, here we are. You know, we SHOULD be able to just head east and go through the cave there. Why don’t we try that?”
“Because we’re just not going to be that lucky?”
“Oh, phooey.”
“But I want to try anyway. Come on, you two.”
*sigh* “Ever the optimist.”
*gasp* “It’s….”
“…Monty Python’s Flying Circus?”
“What? No, not that. Look at the enemies, front row on the right. It’s the legendary Dreidon of the Don family. My Pokemon collection is now complete. Quick, the Pokeballs.”
*snicker*
“Yes, thank you for that double-entendre, Crys, but we don’t HAVE anything like that. This is not a ‘catch them all’ kind of a deal.”
“But… but… it’s a Dreidon?”
“It’s an ugly, brown mole-thing with horns? Why would you even WANT to collect something like that?”
“For luck.”
“It doesn’t DO that.”
“Besides, I thought WE brought good luck.”
“Only at sea.”
“What the hell are you talking about? Oh God, maybe it’s the family genetics starting up.”
“And it doesn’t work. Big freaking surprise.”
“Dammit! Why the hell is there a cave here if they aren’t going to let us into it anyway?”
“Oh well, the old pathway it is.”
“OK, we’re back in Landen. Now could we please get a move on?”
“A hero retraces his steps. Again.”
“I haven’t minded… that much. Because I know what comes next.”
“Ah, yes, the sub parts. Well, let’s waste no time.”
“Could you at least spare me the indignity and look away or something?”
“No can do, Wren. You’d think I’d miss this?`”
“OK, fine!”
“I… wow. That… that looked…”
“Stupid?”
“Not quite the word I was looking for.”
“Well, tough luck, because it’s the one you’ll get. And Mieu… STOP LAUGHING!”
“Ahahahaaahaaa… oh… oh… sorry, Wren. No, really.”
“Yes, I can see you’re all sincere and stuff. Still, knock it off.”
“I mean… now that I’ve humiliated myself in the first place.”
“Oh, come on, Wren. It’s not that bad.”
“And of all the places we could exit in this region, we pick the small one.”
“You better not be going anywhere with that statement.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Nothing. I… just forget I ever said anything.”
“Weirdo.”
“Oh, don’t you get me started.”
“At least there aren’t any paths leading anywhere and everywhere in this place.”
“Or any enemy encounters.”
“That… kind of worries me, actually.”
“Erm… why?”
“Because it means we’re probably in for some kind of stupid revelation that doesn’t make any sense.”
“Well, I guess I can’t argue against that.”
“It’s a temple.”
“One of those teleporting ones? Do we even have anywhere to teleport to in this place?”
“A thousand years, you say? Why, that’s a convenient amount of time to just stand around and wait for… something.”
“I think it’s the ‘if at first you don’t succeed, wait a thousand years and try again’ principle.”
“Well, that should give you plenty of time to prepare, then.”
“How these old geezers have managed to wait for so long, though… they’re not cyborgs, after all.”
“And Laya? Isn’t she supposed to be… y’know… dead?”
“…never mind.”
“Laya and Laya. Yeah, that makes sense.”
“That has to be a lot of fun when you need to call on one of them.”
“I guess this place wasn’t big enough for both of them.”
“We have to go to ‘Frigidia’? That… doesn’t sound like much fun.”
“You sure don’t sound very STOKED about it.”
“…..”
“That wasn’t just lame. That was a stretch, even for you.”
“Or at least that’s what she said.”
“I’m guessing cryogenic sleep isn’t much fun to wake up from.”
“Yeah, morning stiffness can be a real pain.”
“Wren, you… you… what would you know about that anyway?”
“Oooh, buuuurn.”
“Well, there she is. I guess we’ll be getting some answers soon.”
“Then again, maybe not.”
“Christ! Doesn’t anyone ever TELL anyone anything in this place? It’s all just myths and legends and very specific information on where we need to go, but never what we’ll find.”
“And sure, lady. Just invite yourself to the party. It’s not like we mind.”
”
“You look more like one of those water scooters, Wren.”
“That’s true. You got a nice set of handlebars and everything.”
“And now she’s making jokes about my weight. You are evil, Mieu, and you know it.”
“Er….”
“Well, here we are. I hope you’re up for some backtracking, Laya, because we’ll be doing a lot of that before all this is through.”
“That sounds… lovely.”
“Not the word I would use, but whatever makes you happy.”
“Saaay, what with you BEING Laya and all, maybe we could…”
“Could what?”
“Bah! That was a no-go. And you call yourself Laya.”
“Yes, I do, but what does that have to do with this?”
“Just give me a while. I’ll figure out something.”
“Suddenly, going back to cryognenic freeze again doesn’t sound so bad.”
“And the cave is blocked from this side too. That’s just swell.”
“Crys, we were supposed to…”
“Hush now. Don’t interrupt me. Hmm… OK, so we need to go back the old way, huh? Well, if that’s how it’s going to be…”
“Mr. Crys, this isn’t where we’re supposed to go.”
“What are you talking about? Of course we need to go back there now that we have you on our team.”
“Weren’t you listening? We need to go to…”
“Yes, yes. But the more you interrupt us, the longer it’s going to take.”
“Crys, why are you walking all over the place like this?”
“Hey, if I have to retrace my steps like this, I will at least make it SOMEWHAT entertaining.”
“But we didn’t HAVE to…”
“Mieu, will you stop nagging, please? This trip would go much faster if we’d just go where we need to without turning it into a huge conversation piece.”
“Well, finally, we’re at our last small challenge. After that, we’ll finally make some headway.”
“…..”
“At last… we’re done with the boring parts. Now… NOW… we can finally start thinking of where we need to go. So, Laya, which direction did we need to head off to again?”
“Like the old guardians told you, we head southwest from Aridia and through the caves.”
“….WHAT?!”
“That’s what I tried telling you, you goddamned idiot!”
“But… but… the backtracking. We ALWAYS have to backtrack. That’s one of the cardinal rules in this world.”
“Um… what are you talking about?”
“Long story, I’ll tell you later. But it figures that the ONE time we didn’t have to, we go and do so anyway.”
“Yessir, this sure is a blast.”
“It’s your fault, so stop bitching about it.”
“I can see this journey is going to be barrels of fun.”
“Eh, don’t let it get to you. I’m used to it by now.”
“OK, here we are. At least we’re going to the right place this time.”
“It’s even somewhere new.”
“Joy.”
“It’s a mstry that we got this far.”
“Stop that!”
“And look, it’s our old friend, the glass floor.”
“Uh oh. Laya, DON’T LOOK DO..”
“AAAAAARGH!”
“..WN! Drat!”
“Ten meseta says she’ll throw up.”
“Ten meseta says she’ll panic and run off the railing-less floor and fall to her death.”
*urp* “I’m SO GLAD my discomfort brings you so much entertainment.”
“Just ignore them.”
“Yeah, you’ll get used to it. Which will be a shame, come to think of it.”
“…..”
“Hey, look. It’s Baldie Smurf.”
“What the… why is he standing in a post-slash position?”
“What? You expect things to suddenly start making sense now?”
“Just wait until you see how they attack, which should be any second now.”
“And he waves his dingus at us. Must be a common theme with cave dwellers.”
“If it’s alright with you guys, I’m going to refrain from asking what ‘dingus’ means.”
“Wise choice.”
“Hey, more Laser stuff. Do any of you feel like making battles last longer?”
“What? Are you joking? Throw that thing away, already.”
“I feel like I should say something at this point, but I’m afraid of getting murdered by two of my party members.”
“That sure looks like a dangerous battle stance. What kind of horrors are the two of them going to unleash on us, I wonder.”
“She can piledrive me any day, rrrawr.”
“One murder coming up.”
“Is she…. is she cutting her wrist?”
“She is! Of all the stupid things to do.”
“I don’t think those legs and that butt gets this smooth just by itself. I’m guessing she’s just doing the same with her arms.”
“You just HAD to turn this into another one of your bizarre thought processes.”
“Of course. That’s what I live for.”
“Oh hey, a dead end. Haven’t had those for a while now.”
“Not that we’ve been missing those.”
“True dat.”
“Crys, we’ve been standing here for fifteen minutes. Pick a route and be done with it.”
“But… but… what if it’s a dead end?”
“If it is, then I promise not to hurt you… too much.”
“But….”
“I wonder if this is the answer my sister sought after, and if it was what made her wage war against Orakio.”
“Wouldn’t surprise me.”
“Crwn?”
“I guess they couldn’t afford any wovels.”
“The ancient days were hard, weren’t they?”
“And now a Stf. Between this, the Crwns and the Slrs, it’s a wonder we managed to get by.”
“Peoples’ tongues would cramp up regularly these days.”
“If you know what I mean DURHUR!”
“…..”
“I just don’t get you people.”
“Sometimes, you’re not the only one, Laya.”
“Well, here we are. I’m almost afraid to find out what’s waiting for us up here.”
“It’s a whole new region, after all, and the name Frigidia doesn’t exactly fill one with optimism.”
“Well, at least it’ll be somewhere new. Let’s go.”
As Crys said, a new region awaits. And with that, new enemies and new kinds of dangers to be sure. But with that, new experiences and feelings, which will benefit the whole group.
“It’s c-c-c-c-coooold.”
“I c-c-c-can’t f-f-f-f-feel my l-l-l-legs.”
“I-I-I-I-I-I’ve l-l-l-lost all f-f-f-f-f-feelings all over.”
“M-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m….”
“D-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d…”
“F-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f…”
“G-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g….”
“R-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r….
“T-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t….”
“STOP THAT!”